Sex With Sister Tips. Um…Yeah

One of my favorite aspects of wordpress is the list of search engine terms people used to find my blog, and I often refer to the list to give me ideas for blog posts. The terms used to be pretty straightforward — short story tips, describe a scene, meaning of car color — but ever since I posted an interview with my sister called “Was It Bizarre Reading a Sex Scene Written By Your Sister?” I’ve been finding the strangest terms on the list. I had no idea so many people wanted to have sex with their sisters.

These are a few of the terms people Googled, Binged, Yahooed in the past two weeks to get to this blog:

  1. sex with sister tips
  2. my sister sex mi yes
  3. bizarre sister
  4. bizarre sex scenes
  5. sex with sister (at least one of these every day)
  6. bizarre sex (lots of these)
  7. how to have sex with your sister (lots of these)
  8. images of sex with your sister
  9. give me your sex sister
  10. first time sister sex
  11. sex sister (several of these)
  12. sex questions sister
  13. sex with your sister
  14. sex didn’t know it was sister
  15. sex had with your sister
  16. sex with sister scenes

Perhaps some of these refer to song lyrics? I wouldn’t know. I don’t listen to much music except the song of silence.

Besides these terms, there were many focused on how to write sex scenes. Hmmm. I’m not sure I want to give tips on having sex with your sister, but I might be able to come up with some tips on how to write a sex scene. I’ll do some research on erotica and get back to you.

Feel free to leave a comment with your tips on writing sex scenes. But please . . . omit any reference to your sister.

See also: Sex With Sister Tips — Writing Tips, That Is

***

Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Follow Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

24 Responses to “Sex With Sister Tips. Um…Yeah”

  1. Chad Says:

    Hahaha, that is a little awkward and simultaneously twisted, no lie… I guess you could say a view is a view though, maybe somebody’ll be interested

  2. Adina Pelle Says:

    this is hysterical ! I get a kick myself out of the google statistics !

  3. A. F. Stewart Says:

    Number 10 sounds a bit like a title for a twisted how-to guide.

  4. Pat Bertram's Sister Says:

    OH-MY-GAWD, Sistah, this is hilarious! Thank you for adding such a fun and funny post to brighten the day. I will add here my fervent hope that all those people aren’t REALLY trying to figure out how to have sex with their own sisters (ewww), but maybe – just maybe – some of them are looking for ways to seduce their significant others’ sisters…? Or they hope to find stories/photos about two sisters not related to them having sex together…? Although #2, #7, #8 and #14 are HIGHLY suspect!! Gotta love the Internet.

  5. Sherilyn Winrose Says:

    One can only imagine what a google search would do with those words. OM!

    Wish I could explain how I approach sensitive scenes. If I tried I’d undoubtedly come across as insane, or something less savory.

    It’s not about the act though, it’s all about how you get there which makes or breaks these things.

  6. Pat Bertram Says:

    Sherilyn, that’s a good point, that it’s not about the act so much as how you get there. I’ll have to remember that if I ever get to writing a sex scene. I’m going to need one for my WIP, but it’s supposed to be a comic scene. I hope I can make it work.

  7. ~Sia McKye~ Says:

    LMAO! I think it says people have sex on the brain. There are also a lot of warped people out there too. Sheesh.

    Hello to Pat’s sister! Pat can always make me laugh, especially when I’m feeling bad. I love her sense of humor.

    You’ll have to tell Pat how you got this list. I’m now curious to check mine…

  8. Suzanne Francis Says:

    Here’s my funny “search” story, though it isn’t as salacious as yours, Pat. Last year I wrote an entry on Larnach Castle, NZ’s only true stately home, where DH and I stayed the night. I noticed that this post always got lots of hits, so I checked to see if anything was linked to it. I found a slick tourism site, called “Ten Best…” that listed the ten best whatevers to visit ie lakes, mountains, ski resorts… They had included Larnach Castle on the ten best castles where you can spend the night list, and linked it…

    That’s right, to my blog.

    Which is pretty funny, as Larnach Castle has a really nice site of their own. But I get a lot of hits from it, so I’m not complaining.

  9. Kat Sheridan Says:

    Um, ok, now everytime someone looks up my name, is it going to be linked to the title of this article? Twisted and weird (and how surprising it must be for those doing the search to come across your article instead!) Sherrlyn got it right, it’s about what happens beforehand. And also what happens after. And it doesn’t have to be long or detailed. Here’s an example of a perfectly gorgeous sex scene I read last night, from “Protector of the Flight” by Robin D. Owens. The couple had been having misunderstandings, and were facing going into battle together. The entire scene is this: “Later in the night, he and Calli loved with desperate tenderness.” That’s it. That’s all, and yet it was powerful.

  10. Pat Bertram Says:

    Update. Wow, now I’m really getting the sex sister search terms. Today’s so far are: sister sex (11), sex with sister (8), how to get your sister to have sex with you (3), how to have sex with your sister (2), sex sister (2), sisters sex (1), sister sex stories (1), how to excite sister for sex (1), sister sister sex (1), I want to have sex with my sister (1).

  11. Kathleen Kaufman Says:

    That’s hilarious, and disturbing all at the same time. I really hope all those people are doing research for a fiction book, that’s what I’m going to tell myself anyway.

  12. Vivian A Says:

    Sensations. Intimate scenes revolve around not the mechanics, but the reactions.

    Strange links, but that is half the fun of typing random bits into a search engine.

  13. knightofswords Says:

    When I look at my website stats, I also see lists of weird search terms. What bothers me about it is that more people seem to come on to the site from searches that hit random comments I’ve made rather than using the tags or the primary subject headings. So, I casually mention I once owned a Kaiser Jeep, and people find that and show up. It does me no good, though, because most of those people (according to the site stats) leave within a couple of seconds when they see I’m not selling Jeep parts.

    I’m going to make sure not to use sex and sister in the same sentence. Goodness knows what will happen then.

    Malcolm

  14. mickeyhoffman Says:

    Well that certainly puts a new face on things. But hell, if it attracts readers it can’t be all bad?

  15. Donna Says:

    So it continues, eh Pat? Thanks for the update and best laugh of the day.

    As a few others have commented, I think intimate scenes are best when the details are left to the imagination rather than being explicitly spelled out. Some scenes come across more like a “how to” manual rather than advancing the plot. This might be a good topic for your discussion group: What makes a love scene effective?

  16. shanna Says:

    seriously ill

  17. Rita J. Webb Says:

    Wow. That’s crazy!

    Though I’d love to read any tips about writing sex scenes. That would be useful information.

  18. joylene Says:

    My belly hurts. Sex with your sister, eh? Well, sister, at least they’re finding you. The how is hilarious, but excellent as long as sales continue to grow.

  19. joylene Says:

    oops, meant to write suggestions. Try keeping a pad and pen next to the bed the next time you’re with your significant other. Perform, stop, write pointers, go back for more, pause, take notes, then dive back in.

    Should be a snap.

  20. Pat Bertram Says:

    Joylene, right. A snap.

  21. R.B. Parsley Says:

    Pat,
    A very good article. Writing about any type of incest scenes is a rarity. You handled the subject quite well. But scene examples would have made your article even better.Hope you will be writing more on this subject soon, but with plenty of examples. Excellent article!

    Randy

  22. Che Says:

    Wow I must say that’s RIDONCULOUS but completely hilarious. I like this article it’s so simple yet it’s got me peeing my pants with apple juice from laughter…great job :)

  23. that Jeff Johnson Says:

    Perhaps I’ve stumbled onto a new avenue to drive visits… ;-)


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